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Tuesday, 11 March 2008


Alan down in Florida

"It's OK to be gay on AI but please be discrete about it and please do not remind us of it."

Why limit your world view to AI? Your above statement is the view of most Americans on the subject of homosexuality. Period. End of statement.

This is the mindset that gives us Don't Ask Don't Tell.

This is the mindset that gives us constitutional amendments banning gay marriage. It's OK for consenting adults to do as they please behind closed doors but how dare we be in their faces about it?

One of my best friends and his partner have fairly recently relocated from gay-friendly suburban Fort Lauderdale to Augusta Georgia where they have quickly become prized invitees to all of the best social activities available. They don't hide their relationship but neither do they emphasize it. Consequently they fit in a lifestyle chock full of gay men, nearly all with wives who are complicit with their down low behavior. And while on the surface it might seem odd, it is how it has always been in the South. As long as we didn't molest children or do it in public places or bring shame upon our families our unconventional sex lives were an "eccentricity" that polite society didn't discuss.

I agree that Danny Noriega's transgressive sissytude is courageous, especially in a world where Lawrence King can be murdered in a classroom for daring to have a crush on a male classmate. My question has always been from where does sissyness come? Once upon a time that was the only image of homosexuality one would see in the media and, as such, was the only role model for many gay youth. That image has mostly gone the way of Amos & Andy in terms of stereotyping and yet sissies develop everywhere, truer role models notwithstanding. And for a kid Danny's age to behave like that is a reminder that teenagers are sexual beings which is a fact that Americans have never wanted to deal with - especially when that desire is same-sex.

As I mentioned in a private note, I was at a gay teen website over the weekend and was amazed - not only at the amazing endowments of kids who didn't look old enough to grow a treasure trail but by the numerous photos of these kids having sex for the whole worldwide to see. That is what the majority of straight people see when they look at a sissy like Danny and that's what this Puritanical Christian nation wants to crush.


Bravo Denny, Bravo. We will only ever be accepted by others when we accept ourselves for whom we are; butch, nelly or neutral. We live in a time when society at large (seems way too often that Richard does too) insists that we occupy our designated target market in order to be valid. I'm sick of being told that I cannot belong to the gay "community" because I refuse to be a top or a bottom, or a twink or a bear or a queen or a sissy or a bitch (well most of the time) or a daddy or a slut or......... to wear any other costume in order to hide who I am. Drag by any other name would smell ..... of closet.

I've been out for well over thirty years and been with my mate for almost 28. Anyone who has ever had any problems with that has never had the balls to confront me with it, because they know I'm very comfortable just being me. As a very good friend of mine used to say, many years ago, before he died, "I'm more of a man than you'll ever be, and more of a woman than you'll ever get."

I couldn't believe AI let Danny on the show in the first place. I loved seeing him each week and have lost interest in the show without him. He is talented, cute and yes sexy!
I thought Simon showed just how homophobic he really is and am glad you agree. He's a real asshat.

Sissies throw the fact that they won't conform right in the face of society. I think it's because they really didn't know they were different until people (mostly men) wanted to hurt them because of who they are, so now they feel they have taken so much crap for so long that acting silly and not like the other boys become their way of getting back. They are brave and bold and FU if you don't like it. After all one can only take so much crap for so long! Besides life is more fun when your free...


your post got me thinking a lot of questions.

what is a sissy? is it invention or real behavior? I've never read something serious about it nor about their perception by (straight) males.

In and out,Movie with Kevin Kline, comes to my mind. The movie is dumb and stereotypical on gays, but there is a scene where Kline, the closeted Homo, tries to repress his sissiness. A instruction from cassette tells him to behave manly when 70's dance music is tempting him to move. He can't resist and let the sissy in him take control. His conclusion is that he is gay.

But that is to easy for an answer to me. The frightening thing is, this 70's-dance-music-sissy is probably in all us gay or straight. We all have to confess that we done that secretly.

The out and about effeminate do it openly. Maybe they don't want to make it secretly. Maybe they can't.

when the straight guy or closeted gay sees Denny singing, he maybe likes it, but hates himself for his feelings. the effeminate behavior makes you look gay, even if you are straight and just want to lose control.
they are reminder that being manly is no requirement to be a man. they confuse and confusion is not liked

the reason they are outsiders is because the are not shown on screen or are always the stereotypical gay. There is no(few) men, which are straight mostly manly, but sometimes a sissy. either the male hero or the sissy sidekick.


I'm ashamed to admit that I am one of those gay men that CRINGE when I see effeminate gays.

HOWEVER, I found myself really pulling for Danny to make it into the final 12 and even farther.

I do disagree with you about his singing ability. I think he was one of the weaker singers by the time he left. Now if they didn't have to vote off an equal amount of Guys and Girls each week then no doubt Danny should still be in ahead of all but 2 of the girls. That part sucks about the show, it should just be the bottom 4 each week during the pre-finalist shows.
No disrespect to female singers, I've LOVED some of the previous years female singers, just this year they are WEAK!

As for the judges final comments during his last performance, I don't remember taking Simmons comments as derogatory to Danny's gayness. (At least my "Offence-dar" didn't go off. And I remember Paula even saying things that I took as, (MY interpretation) "Yeah, you really sucked tonight, BUT I REALLY REALLY want America to vote to keep you in!"

I also do think that Homophobia played a factor in his being voted off, but I think his singing quality helped either.

I LOVED watching Danny! BUT ALL of you KNOW that he would have done every performance in drag if they had let him.

Danny was "Fierce"! (nod to Project Runway)

OMG, it's just hit me! I've become a reality TV QUEEN!

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